Monday, October 26, 2009

Monday Monday ......
So good to me...
With apologies to The Mamas and the Papas.

Wild weekend in the ER. The number of disappointed patients who DID NOT receive a definitive diagnosis of H1N1 was staggering.

You'd be amazed how many people come in wanting to be tested just so they can have bragging rights that they had Swine Flu.

There's some kind of Jerry Springer parallel Universe out there or something. People actually getting angry because were not testing them. Doesn't matter if they fit the testing parameters. They want to be tested so they can go home and brag about having Swine Flu.

The only good thing I can see is that if they didn't have the Flu when they got there, they damn sure were exposed to it while they were in the ER.
I hope they get as ill as I was for the last 2 weeks.
It'll serve the dumb shits right.

Maybe I should start selling "I Survived The Swine Flu" tee shirts.

We had a HUGE FAIL in the - How to fake Stroke Symptoms yesterday.
40 year old Zombie that we know well comes in and tells the Triage nurse she's having a stroke. Facial drooping, right side weakness and difficulty speaking.

The Triage Nurse asks her to smile and this Zombie actually reaches up and pulls down the corner of her mouth. She does the same thing when asked to stick her tongue out. Total loss of style points there.

When then asked to raise her arms up in front of her she says she can't raise her right arm.

The nurse says to her, "Why not? You just lifted that arm up and pulled down on the corner of your mouth. Did you suddenly become crippled too?"

This string of logic pissed her off, but not enough to get her to leave & she continued with the game long enough that she did get seen by a Doc. She tried the same shit with him and he told her she was wasting his time and to get lost.

She's a Medicaid patient of course.
You Tax Dollars at Work!

Just wait. It's gonna get worse.

Gratuitous Picture for a Monday Evening-
Dealing with these goofy bastards would be a lot easier if more of them looked like this.



But hell no.

Most of 'em look more like this.