Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Oh, Was That My Head, Your Knee Ran Into in the ER, Yesterday??

Nothing says, "Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men" - like a friggen' knee to the back of the head. Did I not tell you that the Holiday Season brings out the best in the Zombies?

"I'm so depressed!! My life sucks!! I want to kill myself!! Except, I don't have the balls to really do it!! I want you all to feel sorry for me - as long as it's on my terms."

Jeepers!! A suicide attempt is against the law, people. Don't be a scoff law, dammit!!


Don't drink a bunch of beer, take a handful of pills and immediately call your loved one and tell them about your asshole move. Your Insignificant Other will call 911 and EMS will have to bring your dumb ass into the ER. Then some poor, burnt out RN like me will have to do shit that you won't like. Needles and tubes. Think, Needles and Tubes.

Oh, and fighting with the ER staff and the Police will NOT make you look like a stud.

But that bastard DID get a knee into the back of my head. Surprised the shit out of me that the fat bastard was flexible enough to do that.

My bad. I must be slippin'.

No, I didn't choke the shit out of him or drill him in the chops. Sure, I thought about it for a second, but I'd get in a world of shit and Zombies are just not worth gettin' in trouble over. Somehow, ER Nurses are just expected to put up with this kinda shit.

No, I don't know why that is. I've pressed charges on a few of 'em, but nothing happens. The Zombie Lawyer uses that charge as a barginning chip in the plea agreement and a charge of - "Fu*king with the ER Nurses" doesn't seem to carry much weight. Poof! They just magically dissappear.

I will say that the local cops are none to gentle with Zombies who f**k with the Nurses. Bless 'em. ER workers and Cops, have a symbiotic relationship. I always try to help the Cops and Damn, they sure help me when I need 'em. They just weren't there yet.

I'm upset that I let that Zombie sandbag me into thinking things were cool. That never would have happened a few years ago.

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